End Of Year Notes For Dynamite's Diary

Instead of trying to cram in one more chapter of my Death Battle fanfic Dynamite's Diary before the end of the year, I thought I might do something different and discuss the stuff I included so far. I felt it only made sense to talk about some of the ideas I came up with and why I included certain plot points.

I was already imagining what it would be like if Boomstick had a daughter, even before the Tatsumaki preview revealed it. She does not have a name in the original Death Battle series, but I decided to settle on Dynamite because (1) it was the name of a weapon like her father's name and (2) it could be shortened down to Dynah in certain situations. My interpretation of the character is that she's pretty much of a daddy's girl who shows signs of following in his footsteps with her personality and interests, but at the same time is struggling to carve out her own identity and get by at school without any hassle (something that may not be possible now considering a later incident that I will discuss later on).

One of the major things I had to be careful about was the dreaded Mary Sue trope. I did not want Dynamite to come across as a glorified stand-in, especially since there's no room for that type of characterisation in a dysfunction universe like Death Battle in the first place. I feel that the first-person perspective does help in a way - obviously Dynamite would glorify herself in certain situations and try and cover up some of her flaws. It also explains why Lottie comes across as extra prissy and snobbish despite them being in the same friend circle. Additionally, I wanted to make it clear that though Dynamite is a fairly skilled fighter due to her home training, she's still not on the same level as Boomstick - thus the scene where he easily defeats her in a close-range fight whilst still asleep.

I was partially inspired by the Dork Diaries books with regard to the tone and style of writing. The narrator Nikki J. Maxwell tended to be pretty dramatic at times, so thought Dynamite could be the same on occasions, complete with capitalised or italicised words for dramatic emphasis. Obviously she's not as dramatic as her father, but she has her moments.

The original plan was to have a chapter each day, with breaks being taken over the weekend. Ultimately though, I chose to make it a weekly format for a variety of reasons. One was because of real life responsibilities, and the other being that I eventually wanted to write other fanfics and creative pieces without one of them overshadowing the others. That said, there were times in which I was able to get more than one chapter done in a week.

The fanfic obviously started with the aftermath of Season 6 of DBX. My main problem with the ending of that season was that despite several moments in it involving the tumultuous friendship between Ringmaster and Boomstick and a moment in which Ringmaster suffers a mental breakdown over supposedly "losing" his friends, it simply ends with Ringmaster finally choosing Jocelyn to be his co-host and does not bring up Boomstick again. I felt it was a bit of a waste of a potential plot point, so I thought - wouldn't Boomstick feel betrayed by Ringmaster simply "discarding" him after supposedly getting a chance to co-host alongside him? Plus, since Dynamite is super protective of her father and knows about when he initially hosted DBX himself, it was only natural that she'd get pretty pissed off despite actually liking Jocelyn. I have a potential story idea about how Boomstick and Ringmaster made up after the incident, but I'll bring it up another time - I already showed some hints of it in my fanfic so far. ;P

In a way, Dynamite is kind of deluding herself when it comes to her initial grudge against Ringmaster. Sure, she definitely has a point about some of the stuff he did with Boomstick, but part of the reason that she lets Wiz off the hook compared to him is simply because she's known about him for longer. I've actually come with another story idea as to why Boomstick values Ringmaster as a friend so much, and I feel that it would really play into his abandonment issues and a time when Ringmaster made him feel less lonely, something that Dynamite does not know yet. Plus, even though I created the character of Marlene to serve as a potential niece for Ringmaster, in reality she's the complete opposite of him and instead he shares more similarities with Dynamite's lifelong vitriolic best bud Lottie.

I had to be careful when working on the Disney World chapter. I was originally going to mention Splash Mountain and how it's the most terrifying ride if you go on it at night time, but I ultimately skipped over it for two reasons. The first reason was because it's getting a re-brand soon into a Princess and the Frog ride. The second and most important reason of all was due to the fact that its inspiration Song of the South is a disturbingly racist film and with the Black Lives Matter campaign going on currently, I felt it was better to just not mention the ride in respect for the campaign.

Another chapter I had to be careful about was the one where Dynamite introduces her friends to Boomstick and he fights her whilst asleep. I was aware that out of context, this could be taken as a messed-up form of child abuse, but that was not what I was aiming for at all. Boomstick would NOT be that type. I was thinking more along the lines of the hardcore training sessions you get in Shonen manga - think Master Roshi's training of Goku and Krillin in Dragonball, Monkey D. Garp's training of Luffy and Ace in One Piece and Izumi Curtis' training of Ed and Alphonse Elric in Fullmetal Alchemist. The sleep fighting business was also inspired by a scene in Soul Eater NOT! involving the ditzy Meme Tatane beating up the creepy Annie Wilkes parody Misery whilst still asleep. I also imagine that this sort of training has run in the Boomstick family for generations, such as the times Mama Boomstick trained her son in martial arts and hot dog eating.

Knowing that the 150th episode of Death Battle was coming up and that Boomstick's search for his father would play an important role in it, I decided to have it show in the chapters leading up to it. Especially the one released on the day before, in which he essentially gets stuck in a depression-like state. I honestly had no idea what would actually happen, but the main idea I had in general was that Episode 150's outcome may have a huge impact on the way Dynamite sees her family in general. Which it did - especially since I did not see the return of Mama Boomstick coming AT ALL. I really want to write a fanfic someday from Boomstick's perspective focusing on this search - it would give me more of a chance to explore in my own words what his final few days before Episode 150 were like and what his thought process at the end of the episode was like.

The chapter involving Dynamite and Ringmaster fighting the droids was already planned from the start, and I was already thinking about releasing it in late October, but Episode 150 of Death Battle really helped me to develop it further. I wanted Dynamite to sort of ease up around Ringmaster, but as soon as Boomstick was able to let go of and move on from the issues surrounding his deadbeat father, I realised that this could tie in perfectly with Dynamite and Ringmaster's relationship, with Dynamite eventually letting go of her grudge towards Ringmaster over what happened to Boomstick with regard to the whole DBX business. After all, the spat between Boomstick and Ringmaster only happened during the summer. The psychological scarring that Boomstick's dad gave him has lasted a lifetime.

The joint Halloween costume that Dynamite and Boomstick have in the Halloween chapter was inspired by a real one that my mum and one of her friends had at university for a costume competition. My mum was Little Miss Muffet and her friend was the spider. They won that competition! I'd also like to point out that my brother dressed as a spider for Halloween this year and it was really cool. No, it was not a ridiculous oversized outfit. It consisted of black clothes and a spider's thread painted on his face. I imagine that Dynamite would wear the black clothes as well, though she would have probably had oversized spider's limbs stuck to her back.

As absurd as Pinewood Springs Public School sounds, there is sadly some truth in this. My mother was a teacher at Hammersmith School in Shepherd's Bush and she has plenty of horror stories about it. The teachers were utterly apathetic, fireworks were set off in the corridors and one of the Maths teachers never taught his students maths at all - just table tennis. In fact, it was often joked that the students graduated onto Wormwood Scrubs, a nearby prison just across the road. Fortunately, Sir William Atkinson was appointed the head in 1994 and he improved the school by a LONG way. It is now known as Phoenix Academy and the story how Atkinson turned the school around served as inspiration for BBC's Hope and Glory, starring Sir Lenny Henry as Atkinson's fictional counterpart Ian George.

I ultimately decided to make up a musical for the school play arc, rather than use one that already existed. I imagine The Christmas Ring being similar to other golden age musicals such as Oklahoma!, Guys & Dolls and The Music Man, with Oklahoma! probably being the biggest influence. I have to say, whilst I had nothing against the chapters involving the preparation, I honestly prefer the chapters that focus on Dynamite's relationship with Boomstick, thus why I had him involved more in later chapters.

I always thought of having the fight scene between Dynamite and Kinsey in one of my projects before applying it to this fanfic and having it as the unexpected climax of the school play arc. Originally I was thinking about featuring straight-up murder, but I felt pretty awkward about it for a while, especially since it happens near the school and the first-person narrative meant that I didn't have time to completely delve into why Kinsey was such a nasty piece of work. Thus, I set up the poll in order to have the readers decide (you can still answer it here).

Kinsey Fitchhurst is heavily based on MacKenzie Hollister from Dork Diaries...and I absolutely LOATHE that character. She's an extremely shallow, petty and one-note character who keeps bragging on about how beautiful she is and at one point tried to frame the main character for cyber-bullying. I would have loved to have featured her in the diary as the one that Dynamite blows up, but ultimately it made more sense to introduce an original character instead. Also, I pretty much utilised exact words for the foreshadowing of what was going to happen between her and Dynamite. After all, Dynamite said she wanted to avoid a confrontation with Kinsey at school. She never said anything about confronting her outside of school, didn't she? ;)

Adding to the fight scene, yes, I was inspired by the Arlong Park arc in One Piece in a sense, given that Dynamite handing Boomstick her cardigan before fighting Kinsey has some similarities with Luffy giving Nami his hat before fighting Arlong. I always love that scene, especially the moment in which Luffy first punches that scumbag Arlong in the face before calling him out for making Nami cry. Next up - find a way to do a poster parody of Episode of Nami with Death Battle characters (without Kinsey of course)! XD

In a way, the fight scene was one of the riskiest chapters I wrote. Besides the fact that it was going to involve a high school girl getting blown up just outside of school (and I'm still not sure whether she survived or not), a major problem was trying to make sure that Dynamite (an OC stand-in) didn't come off as a Mary Sue who saved the day whilst Boomstick (a legitimately canonical character) was relegated to being a helpless victim that needed saving due to being insulted by a random teenager. The answer I came up with was to only make it seem that way in Boomstick's eyes - obviously he'd be in awe of his daughter standing up for him and would see her in a glorified light in response. For Dynamite on the other way, she ends up seeing it as a brash mistake she made that could really screw her over in the future. Additionally, I plan to reveal the reason Boomstick got upset over being called a "disgusting tramp" later on.

The Christmas chapter overlaps with a short story I wrote this year focusing on Boomstick and his mother seeing the Christmas lights in Texas, with events being told from Dynamite's perspective this time. Something I've realised is that it's easier to write from a different character's perspective such as Dynamite's than Boomstick's, since he has a very specific and distinct voice - thus why I wrote his stories in the third person rather than the first like Dynamite's Diary or the Christmas fanfic I wrote last year from Wiz's perspective. There's not really much I can add to this, other than the fact that I'm surprised that I got this chapter finished in time on Boxing Day given all of the Christmas stuff that was distracting me.

Anyway, that will be it for this creative summary of mine. Dynamite's Diary will be continuing in 2022 and hopefully there will be new stuff that I can explore with her, such as whether she can properly fit in at school with a background like hers and what kind of person she plans to be now that she's learnt a bit more about her crazy family. Thanks to all of you who have caught up with so far and I wish you a happy new year! :D

Dynamite's Diary - 26th December 2021

Nothing much really happens on Boxing Day - it is after the big day after all - so I thought I might as well get on with writing about what happened over this Christmas in general.

So Christmas Eve was a mad rush in the morning - I had to get some last minute shopping done since I'd COMPLETELY forgotten to do it earlier. Let me tell you, it was NOT a fun experience. There were screaming kids just running around and knocking stuff off the shelves, people taking too long looking at the stuff and not moving out of the way to let others get by, and at one point I was held up by some bitchy woman in a fur coat (do they really still sell those things?!) who was taking too long at the till moaning about being "overcharged" for a pack of stockings.

But I managed to get it all done in the end, and so I was able to have lunch at Mom's place. She just served up tacos as usual - it's the only thing she really knows how to cook. And even if she did try to make them more "Christmassy" by adding sage and onion to them, they just ended up tasting weird. On the bright side, she did like the gift I gave her, which consisted of ten food vouchers for the nearby taco diner.

Anyway, I ended up heading over to Dad's place for the evening, though he was just heading out with Jack Spaniels when I got there. He told me that he was going to meet up with Grandma and go for a walk with her. Possibly see the Christmas lights in the city.

Interesting choice, I thought as he left. I thought for sure he'd have tried to take her to the nearby shooting range instead. But to each their own I guess.

Since I'd already seen the Christmas lights earlier on this month, I didn't think I was really missing out on anything. That said, it wasn't that eventful at the shack, given that the only other occupant was Dad's pet snapping turtle Snappy, and the biggest event involving him was me trying to feed him without getting my fingers bitten clean off in the process.

So most of the time, I was just texting my mates and finding out if their Christmas Eve was more interesting than mine, as well as making some milkshakes and drinking them up. Not that it was too bad - I had quite a bit of fun choosing the variety of flavors for the drinks (strawberry, chocolate, banana, you name it) as well as blending them all together, but you can only make so many before you start to run off of milk and ice cream.

At one point, things were so low-key I just randomly decided to clean up a pile of scrap metal that had been sitting in the corner of the shack for YEARS. Why Dad hasn't bothered to do it himself, I had no idea.

Most of it was just garbage that couldn't be used for anything. There was however a pretty cool robot I found that resembled one of those Transformer toys. Sure, the paint was peeling off and it looked crudely made, but I thought I might as well get it out and place it on the side table. It would spruce the place up a bit more, right? And so, finally getting that out the way, I simply got back to lounging on my bed and checking my phone.

I got quite the jump scare when the door suddenly flung open, with Dad stepping in soon afterwards. But the real shocker was that he'd taken GRANDMA home with him.

I pretty much dropped my phone because I was so stunned, and then struggled to make words and pick it up at the same time. All I could get out was "Oh, hey, uh-" like a true mess.

Dad had to be an outright troll on the whole situation. He was all smug with his arms crossed and saying "Dynah, you're binge-drinkin' the milkshakes again".

I was about to argue that no, I wasn't binge-drinking them, I just had some of them to give myself more energy. But then he took one look at the robot next to me and just freaked out. Now it was HIS turn to start spluttering - "Y-you found it! But where did you-".

Well I told him where it was alright. And then he grabbed it and kissed it before showing it off to Grandma like an excited kid.

"You remember this, don't you Mama? The Lazer Robot you made for me when I was ten?"

And Grandma chuckled and said "I sure do son".

Can I just say that thing shot out lazers from its eyes like some sort of demon when Dad shook it about? It actually looked really cool, and I seriously wish that I'd had more toys like that when I was younger. Even if Jack got spooked out by it and smashed one of the windows in the process.

Dad clearly thought it was cool too, because he was all like "And the eye lazers still work! Oh this is awesome! So glad that the family's all here!"

I almost said, "Well, nearly all of them". But then I decided not to. After all, the IMPORTANT family members were here. Not the ones who didn't deserve to celebrate Christmas with us. So I simply said "Yeah, it sure is".

We had that squirrel pie that Dad had stored, and I got to hear a very interesting story from him about how he'd really wanted this Lazer Robot that they had in the shops when he was ten, but him and Grandma couldn't afford it so Grandma made him his own version for Christmas instead. Honestly, I feel like you already get a better deal from a homemade gift if it comes with real lazers that you can shoot stuff with, rather than something that looks like lazers, as was apparently the case with the one they were unable to get. He'd lost it in that pile some time ago, but now that he'd found it again, he couldn't wait to play with it some more.

So that was Christmas Eve. As for Christmas Day, we got to exchanges our prezzies with each other. I had to make a SUPER last minute gift for Grandma before they were handed out, given that I hadn't expected her to show up. Ultimately, I just decided to use some of the scrap metal to make a gun shaped door plate that she could possibly use. I think she liked it.

Dad's mates turned up at one point to give him a joint present, which turned out to be a giant teddy bear with an eyepatch. Dad got super emotional and weepy about it and was kissing that too.

"Well, it was Marshall's idea," Wiz said, kinda flustered. "I told him it wasn't cheap, but he insisted that if we both paid for it, it would be fine."

Marshall looked so pleased with himself about that. And then they proceeded to wish Dad a merry Christmas before heading off again. Apparently they'd already spent a lot of time together yesterday so there wasn't really much to catch up on, though they all planned to go to the same New Year's party together.

Christmas lunch consisted of Grandma's take on Christmas turkey...which consisted of it smothered in chilli sauce and squirrel paste. Kinda tasted delicious AND disgusting at the same time. Hey, at least the chocolate pudding that came afterward was straight-up nice.

Then for the rest of Christmas Day, I got to hang out with my pals and just catch up with what they were doing. None of the shops and cafes were open, so I made sure to bring the spare milkshakes from yesterday over so they could enjoy them. X3

On a slight bummer note, Steve had to spend time with his family for Christmas, but he said he liked my gift that I posted to him. After all, even if he already has plenty of basketballs, it doesn't hurt to get him a red and black one with flame decals on it, right?

Now it's Boxing Day, and Grandma's gone back to her place again. I have to say that, questionable cooking choices aside, I did like her, even if I felt super awkward about getting to know a relative who I'd been told was dead for years until suddenly finding out that she was alive. Maybe she can give me some martial arts pointers as well? Dad says she's really good with those.

All that's left to do now is just wait until the New Year. Hopefully I get to stay up and watch the fireworks this time round, rather than spend the time stuck in Mom's faulty bathroom like last year - it's a long story, believe me. And given the craziness that happened earlier this month (another long story, as explained in my previous diary entry), it should also give me time to unwind and forget my worries like Christmas Day did.

Christmas Lights

Christmas Eve. It was already getting dark out when Boomstick headed through those dark woods, keeping Jack Spaniels on a lead so he didn't go running off. A cold chill made its way through the way, making his arm hairs stand on end.

Earlier that day, he'd spent some time with Wiz and Ringmaster, having the Christmas lunch at work. Boomstick had volunteered to cook the turkey and felt that he'd done a good job with it. Who cared if it was slightly more cooked than it should have been normally? Well, okay, slightly was a gross understatement, but they ate it all the same.

But he couldn't stay for the office party that Ringmaster had insisted on having, despite Wiz's protests. Much as Boomstick would have liked to take part, he'd already arranged something that night with his mother. After all, it had been years since they'd last been in contact with each other and it only felt right to spend Christmas together again to celebrate their reunion.

Boomstick had to put in some extra effort to convince his mother to come into town to see the Christmas lights. She'd been concerned about the squirrels outside her trailer, and had said it would be better to spend time at home. But ultimately she'd relented and simply gotten to work fixing up traps to sort them out with.

As he made his way through the forest, Boomstick could recognise the trailer that his mother resided in. It did have a line of traps filled with squirrel carcasses after all. Making his way round them so he didn't made the mistake of stepping in one of them, Boomstick went up to the door and swiftly knocked on it.

"Mama! Out here!"

He stepped back to let Mama Boomstick open the door. Fortunately she hadn't blasted it open with her shotgun like she'd done when they'd met back in October. She still had it on her person though, along with a tatty plastic bag.

"Sure, I'll be comin', booby."

Boomstick knocked his fists together with a nervous grin on his face. "Okay, it's probably gonna take some time to get there, but hopefully we won't be too late." He started to head off, believing that Mama Boomstick was following him already.

"Wait, hold on a sec," Boomstick stopped and turned round to hear what his mother had to say. "You’re NOT going into town like that. You’ll catch your death of cold. Here, I’ve got something that should sort that out."

She went back into the trailer, before coming out with a thick red woolly jumper. "Knitted this for you especially. Hope you like the design on it.”"

Boomstick held it out before his eyes. It was ridiculously tacky. There was a lurid yellow robot on the front with two giant shotguns in an X-shape in front of it decorated with Christmas bells and holly. Plus, it was a size too big. Even Boomstick had to admit that it was not up to quality standards at all, but at the same time he found something oddly endearing about it. He let out a small chuckle before putting it on. Sure, the ends on the sleeves flopped over his hands, but he could easily roll them up. And it actually felt comfortable. No itching sensation whatsoever.

"So, we ready to go?"

"Sure. You lead the way."

***

It took some time for the two of them to walk into the city, but they finally made it. The city was abuzz with people getting their last-minute Christmas shopping done and a jazz band playing a rendition of "Wonderful Christmastime".

It wasn't what Boomstick had hoped for though. There were Christmas lights, sure, but they looked generic. They weren't anything crazy like a giant squid or even an asteroid. It was mostly just sheets of lights saying Merry Christmas.

"Well, my daughter will probably like this," Boomstick muttered to himself. "She wouldn't care what they looked like anyway." Of course she wouldn't. She was all about the city anyway.

Mama Boomstick simply looked in the window of a winery that they'd happened to pass.

Both were pretty out of place here. They were just two country rednecks with barely any proper familiarity with the city. They were the types who couldn't afford to rent a flat in one of the high rises or get their shopping in one of the fancy department stores with the nice window displays.

As they walked up the street, Boomstick couldn't help but doubt his choice. Thinking about it, it would have made more sense to take her to the nearby shooting range. That would have suited their tastes much more and then they could bring drinks and get smashed at the same time. He wondered whether the shooting range was even open at the moment.

His thoughts were interrupted by his mother's voice.

"So, you mentioned something about having a daughter."

"Yeah," he nodded. "Name’s Dynamite, but we often call her Dynah for short." He clapped his fists in delight as he said the next bit. "You might even say that she should be called Lil’ Boomstick."

"You get on well with her?"

"She’s a sweetheart. But I’m kinda worried about her. I mean, she’s super boy-crazy – she’s obsessed with this basketball guy Steve at the moment."

"A real dreamboat, huh?"

"I mean, she says so, but I don’t trust that chump one bit. Too good to be true, if you ask me. I bet it’s all a hoax designed to lure innocent girls in."

"Yeah, I get what you mean by that."

"And she’s got a milkshake addiction as well." Boomstick almost let out a laugh over the ridiculousness of it, but ultimately didn’t. "She claims she doesn’t want to become an alcoholic by drinking beer, but I mean, seriously! She chugs down about thirteen of those monsters a day! Think of the sugar intake!"

"Don’t worry. She’ll get over it, I’m sure."

"But aside from those problems, she’s really shaping up. She’s getting better with her fightin’ skills and was real helpful this year when I got stuck in that depressive funk over Dad. Can be a little overprotective though. Only yesterday, there was some asshole from her school who called me a tramp, and she instantly fights her with sticks of dynamite!" He broke out laughing remembering that.

"Oh, I’m sure the brat got what was comin’ to her," Mama Boomstick said, chuckling in response.

"Indeed. She’ll probably live. The ambulance might have turned up in time. I didn't stop to check myself. But the important thing was that Dynah was fine."

"Good to know. Wouldn't want anything bad happening to her."

That was probably the most interesting part of the night so far. Talking with his mother. At least there was that bright spot.

"So how've your friends been?"

"Oh I had Christmas lunch with them earlier on today, and now they're having a workplace party." Another chuckle. "Marshall's the best at holdin' parties like that - that's just the kind of person he is."

He thought about it, and then tried to hide his disappointment. Surely something crazy would have happened at the lab by now. Wiz would probably be complaining about something Ringmaster did that he didn't approve of and Ringmaster would probably have had some accident involving the special effects he planned on bringing to spice things up. Hell, maybe there was a fight happening there right now?

Nothing of that calibre was happening where Boomstick was right now, for all he knew. His mother wasn't threatening to shoot anyone who looked at her son all funny and he wasn't threatening to do the same to anyone who looked at her all funny, and Jack Spaniels wasn't threatening to bite anyone who looked at his owner all funny. No crazy hijinks, no potential fights, just two people and a dog walking down the street with nothing else to do but look around and see if there was anything worth calling "interesting".

Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed intern Jocelyn and two other women who appeared to be her gal pals happily chatting one another as they came out of the city mall together with heavy shopping bags. He tried not to pay attention, but it was hard to do when a sense of jealousy came over him. THEY at least appeared to be getting up to something together. Not walking around the high street with nothing to do.

Even going into the backstreets, where Boomstick had gotten into an intervention with an abusive dog owner some years back, didn't provide something worthwhile. There were just more Christmas lights decorating the street lamps and houses.

There needed to be something else to this night out. Boomstick had an idea.

"How 'bout we do one of those Christmas pub crawls for old time's sake?"

"I...don't have any money on hand," Mama Boomstick stated regretfully.

"That's fine," Boomstick replied. "I was planning to pay for us both anyway."

He paused suddenly, having gained an odd feeling, before briskly checking his pockets. Nothing in them.

"Shit!"

"There a problem?"

"My wallet’s gone again! I can’t find it!"

"Stolen?"

"I don't know! Either someone nicked it or I left it behind!"

Great. Just when it seemed that things had finally been looking up, now they couldn’t go in for a drink. Sure, nothing had stopped Boomstick from just walking in and snatching the drinks in the past, but something didn’t feel right about doing that this time.

Boomstick slumped down on a nearby brick wall. It was all hopeless. He'd so badly wanted to share Christmas quality time with his mum now that they were together again, but nothing was working out. It had all been so uneventful. And now that his wallet was gone...

"Mama..." Boomstick could feel a lump form in his throat and his eyes prickling. "I'm sorry this hasn't worked out. I tried, but-"

"What d'ya mean, 'hasn't worked out'?" Mama Boomstick questioned, confused by her son's apology. "It's workin' out fine!"

"But it wasn't perfect."

Mama Boomstick came and sat down on the same brick wall next to her son. "So what? We're together. We've gotten to see some good Christmas lights. We've gotten to talk with each other. Who cares if its not completely 'perfect'?"

"How was it in any way eventful?"

"Gettin' to meet up with you was eventful. That's all I really wanted to do tonight."

Boomstick felt somewhat touched by this. It was nice to hear that from his mother, even if everything else wasn't working out.

"Yeah, I guess I’ve always been a bit of a perfectionist." Boomstick looked at the ground and sighed. "That was probably why I wanted Dad back in the first place too."

"What, after the way he treated you?!"

"Well...I thought that if he returned, we could be a complete family again. Y'know, like everyone thinks a perfect family should be."

"Yeah, they all seem intent on shoving that idea out in the media." Mama Boomstick rolled her eyes.

"But then when I met up with you again, I realized we were already complete. 'Cause when I thought about it, you're kinda like a father too." Boomstick was able to muster a slight smirk as he turned to face her. "And a better one at that too."

Mama Boomstick was greatly amused by this. "Maybe next time, I should ask people to call me Papa Boomstick as well!"

Mother and son both laughed over this absurd proposal before Mama Boomstick continued.

"Anyway, what I'm tryna say is that you needn't worry. We're together again and we've gotten to spend time with each other again, and really that's all I could ask for. It's just like the Christmases we've had together before and I like it that way. Even if it's not 'perfect', it's fine by me."

Boomstick nodded his head in response, starting to feel a bit better. "Yeah, I agree."

They sat together in silence for a bit, looking at the lights above them. Even Jack Spaniels stopped to get a glimpse at them. Boomstick started to get a warm fuzzy feeling inside. Mama Boomstick was right. Nothing needed to be perfect at all. As long as things were decent enough, and as long as they had each other, everything would be fine. It made him happy to think that, perfect or not, they would be having their first Christmas together in several years.

As he smiled, a single teardrop trickled down his cheek. Mama Boomstick took note of this.

"You okay there?"

"Oh I'm fine." Boomstick let out a slight chuckle as he wiped the tear away with his sleeve. "In fact, I feel great. I'm just glad you're here." He proceeded to wrap his arms around him and hug her tight.

Mama Boomstick hugged him back. "And I'm glad you're here too."

After spending some time hugging, they went back to looking up at the lights together. Jack Spaniels panted happily at the sight of one that resembled a Christmas turkey.

One of the houses behind them had the radio on. Someone on it was mentioning something about playing "Silver Bells". The first notes of it started to play.

Boomstick's feet started fidgeting in excitement as he turned to his mother. "You gonna sing your own version, mama?" He remembered that she'd done a recording of it for a music box he owned, but now that she was right next to him...

"Well of course," she replied, letting out another chuckle. "What other version did you think I was going for?"

She wrapped her arm round him and began to sing. Boomstick closed his eyes and found himself singing too.

“City sidewalks, bloodied sidewalks,
Streets are coated in blood.
There's a feelin' of bloodshed.
Hear 'em screamin', watch 'em dyin',
See death rain from above,
And on ev'ry street corner you'll hear…

Silver guns, silver guns
It’s murder time in the city.
Bang bang bang,
Here them bang,
Just in time for Christmas Day.”

Needless to say, they got some rather odd looks from the one person that passed by. Not that they cared. Or even noticed, for that matter.

Once they sang the final note, Mama Boomstick got up from the wall. "Well. We better be gettin' back then. Over to your place."

"Wait, mine?!" Boomstick was shocked for a moment. "I thought we were headin' back to yours!"

"Why did you think I brought the pajama bag in the first place?" she said as she helped Boomstick up. "Plus it's got your gift in it."

Well that was unexpected, he thought. But I'll be fine with it.

"Sure, we'll do that." Boomstick grinned. "What are we waitin' for?"

***

It was getting close to midnight by the time they got back to Boomstick's shack. Without stopping, Boomstick threw the door open.

Inside was Dynamite, who was pretty startled by their sudden arrival, moreso by Mama Boomstick's appearance. She'd just been in the middle of using her phone and had two milkshakes on the side table next to her.

"Oh, hey, uh-" she spluttered as she struggled to pick her phone up again from her lap.

"Dynah, you're binge-drinkin' the milkshakes again," Boomstick said as he shook with head with an exasperated grin.

But just then, he stopped. He couldn't believe what he was looking at. There was the Lazer Robot that he'd received so long ago when he was a kid. He'd lost it in the house for a while, something that had broken his heart, but now it was there next to the milkshakes.

Boomstick felt his heart soar. "Y-you found it! But where did you-"

"Oh it was in that pile of scrap metal in the corner of the room," Dynamite replied. "You know, the one you haven't sorted out yet? I had no idea what it was doing there, but it looked cool enough so I got it out."

Boomstick gleefully grabbed it and planted a small kiss on it, before showing it to his mother. "You remember this, don't you Mama? The Lazer Robot you made for me when I was ten?"

Mama Boomstick chuckled once again. "I sure do son."

"I thought I'd lost it sometime ago, but here it is again!" Boomstick was practically shaking it in his ecstasy.

The Lazer Robot proceeded to fire its eye lasers again. They smashed through one of the windows, spooking out a squirrel that had almost made the mistake of pawing its way onto it. Jack Spaniels himself started yapping like crazy when he saw the lasers.

"And the eye lazers still work!" Boomstick was practically shaking and laughing with excitement. "Oh this is awesome! So glad that the family's all here!"

"Yep, same here too, son." Mama Boomstick took Boomstick's hat and playfully ruffled his hair for him.

Dynamite was about to say something else, but then stopped herself and simply went for a warm smile.

"Yeah, it sure is."

Jack Spaniels simply panted with a sense of excitement.

With that, they proceeded to get the baked squirrel pie that Boomstick had been storing out and tuck into it. Christmas Eve with the family, he thought to himself with pride. And Christmas Day would be the same as well.

The Puppy In The Backstreets

A week until Christmas. The high street was busy with people rushing past with their shopping. Christmas lights were strung across the buildings, just starting to turn on as dusk approached. A brass band played an instrumental version of "It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year" with much enthusiasm, with some of the passers-up even singing along to it by themselves. Someone dressed up as Santa was going round collecting money for a local church, with a woman dressed as an elf helping him out.

Not that Boomstick payed attention to any of that. He was making his way through the streets, wrapping his arms round himself to keep warm and giving irritable glances to the passers-by.

It had been a pretty shit year for him. The messy divorce he'd had at the beginning of it was just one thing and being separated from his mother a couple of weeks later was another. For the next few months, he'd just felt so miserable and out of it. If he wasn't drinking yet another beer, he was usually crying into his pillow.

He had been slowly recovering though. Going to the nearby shooting range every weekend had helped, as had getting a haircut. He'd even managed to book himself a therapist, so he could actually talk to someone about his problems. Plus, he'd been thinking about getting a job. With all of that happening, he felt that he could simply move on and forget everything bad that had happened to him.

But now Christmas was here. Normally, he'd be perfectly happy to celebrate it, but it just reminded him of how he didn't have anyone to spend it with. His parents weren't there anymore, the few friends he'd made in college had gone their own separate ways and even the therapist was busy with other clients. And he didn't even want to hear any mention of his ex's name.

Boomstick had headed into town just to see if there was anything he could decorate his shack with. Just to make it even slightly more festive for the holidays. But there hadn't been anything that appealed to his tastes. And now he just wanted to get back home. Everyone else's happiness was too much for him at this current moment.

As he made his way into the backstreets, he rubbed his hands together and blew on them just to make them slightly warmer. He tried picking up some speed in his steps in case that helped.

He stopped however when he almost trod on a small puppy underneath, which just managed to move out of the way in time. It rolled on the ground for a bit, as if it had just tripped up, before getting up again.

The puppy's fur was pretty faded and Boomstick could make out that there had been two circular marks on its belly. Male. He'd had a dog when he was a kid and thus could tell what sex certain ones where and what kind of food they liked and how many hours a day it should get outside and all the other useful tidbits of information.

Despite previously being in a bad mood, Boomstick's heart instantly melted. He always had a soft spot for dogs, even moreso if they were puppies. He clasped his hands against his chest and made a high-pitched sound of awe.

Completely smitten, Boomstick went over to pet the puppy, but it instantly hobbled away with a frightened look in his eyes.

"Hey, I'm not gonna hurt you," Boomstick said whilst kneeling down next to the puppy. "I just wanted to say hello. My, you're a cute one."

There was something not quite right though. The puppy looked skinnier than would be considered normal and he seemed to walk with a limp. Boomstick really needed to get home, and he already knew that somebody probably already owned that puppy, but he was still concerned for his sake. Did the owners just not feed it enough?

"Look, I've gotta get home, but I'll be back tomorrow. And then I'll give you something to eat. That be okay?"

***

The next day, Boomstick headed over to the backstreets again with a chicken leg, hoping the puppy was still there. To his delight, he was. He knelt down and held it out towards him.

"Here, buddy," he called out, and the puppy looked over at him. It seemed unsure at first, but them gingerly came over and took a bite of the chicken.

Boomstick reached his hand out to pat the puppy's head, but he nervously backed away again.

It was the same for the next few days. Boomstick would turn up to give the puppy food and he would eat it. Each time, the puppy got somewhat bolder. He still flinched at the idea of being patted or stroked, but sometimes the puppy would rub itself on Boomstick's leg.

And then on Christmas Eve, he just didn't show up.

***

Boomstick was quite surprised when he first realised that the puppy wasn't there. And then he grew worried. He first tried waiting in case it turned up, and when that failed, he started furiously pacing down the streets, hoping that he would come out of one of the houses. No luck.

It was getting dark by now, and Boomstick was now thinking back to those previous days. The puppy had obviously been under-fed for starters, and then there was the limp that he had. And now that Boomstick was taking that all into consideration...

Oh I'm a fucking idiot, he thought to himself, a feeling of disgust and remorse overwhelming him.

Boomstick sat on one of the brick fences, feeling tears welling up in his eyes. Of COURSE he should have taken the puppy home with him. Who cared if someone technically already owned him? He could have easily been a stray too. He was probably dead by now considering the state he'd been in for the last few days.

"You get here! Stupid mutt!"

Boomstick was startled by the voice of an angry man from the house behind him. He didn't know whether the voice was directed at him or someone else, but he got off the fence anyway and rushed over to the front door. He turned the doorknob and open it up.

In the hallway, he could here the sounds of something being hit the the next room. But it was a familiar whimpering sound that made him suspicious. He quickly entered, hoping it wasn't as bad as he expected.

"Oh, no no..."

Boomstick had seen quite a load of fucked-up shit in his life, and being a violent sort himself, he didn't mind at all. But what he saw here genuinely made him feel sick, his stomach churning the whole time.

Inside was a man with a shotgun. But he wasn't using it to shoot anything. He was however using it as a sort of club, beating the same puppy that Boomstick had met for the past few days with it. He could tell from the scrawny body and limp it had.

"Stupid fucking mutt! What did I tell you!"

The puppy made several whimpering sounds with every smack of the gun, but the man paid no mind to them as he continued with the beating.

Boomstick was initially at a loss at what to do. But then he bit down on his thumb with determination.

"You better snap out of it!" he muttered to himself before rushing over to the man and grabbing the arm he was using to wield the gun with.

"God, can you fucking get off me?!" the man rudely said as he tried to push Boomstick aside.

"Get off you?! You get off him?!" Boomstick yelled back without budging.

The man proceeded to grab him in return and slam him again a wall with one hand, the shotgun in the other.

“It's my fucking dog, okay?!” He pointed the gun at Boomstick. “You wanna argue with that?!”

In any other circumstances, the man would had gotten the upper hand. After all, he did appear to have some considerable strength. But here he had made a grave mistake. He was simply someone with a gun on him, someone who relied more on pure intimidation than anything else. Boomstick on the other hand had been trained in combat all his life. He had knowledge on how guns worked and how to handle them.

He grabbed hold of the gun. The man stared on, confused by what was happening.

When Boomstick spoke, his voice unusually had little emotion in it for once. But it was one that dripped with venom.

“You've…you've fucked up, buddy.”

With that, he let loose. He slammed the gun back into the man's face, causing him to stumble backwards. Before the man had time to properly get up and react, Boomstick turned the gun on him and fired it. It struck the man's shoulder, causing him to yell out in agony.

But Boomstick didn't stop there. He fired again at the man's stomach. And then at his left kneecap. And when the shotgun had run out of bullets, he switched over to his own gun leg and used that instead, the sound of shotgun blasts and the man's screams filling the air.

At last, Boomstick settled on his final target - the man's head. He fired one more time.

The resulting blast left a large bloodied smear on the wall behind the man, as well as the man's headless corpse.

For a moment, Boomstick was stuck in a dazed state, not knowing how to respond. But a familiar sound broke him out of it. He turned round and noticed the puppy trembling behind him and still whimpering. There were small puddles of blood around him from when he'd been struck.

It was at that point that Boomstick finally broke. He fell on his knees as tears spilled out of his eyes. Still trembling, he reached out for the puppy, which managed to hobble over into his arms. Boomstick picked him up and hugged him tight, rocking it back and forth a bit in the process.

“It’s – it’s okay,” Boomstick sobbed. “He won't hurt you anymore.” His body shivered even more as he hugged the puppy tighter. “In fact, I – I won’t let anyone hurt you anymore.”

They both whimpered a bit more, though the puppy gradually seemed to calm down. When at last he didn't feel so agitated, his first course of action was to lick Boomstick's face in order to clean up his tears.

Boomstick was slightly startled at first by this. But then he let out a small giggle in response. His voice was still broken, but he was feeling slightly better now thanks to the puppy licking him like that.

"Okay," he said. He sniffed as he wiped one last tear away. "Let's get you sorted out."

Boomstick didn't have any bandages on him, but that didn't stop him from trying. He tore scraps of his sleeves off and wrapped them round the puppy's legs. Sure, it meant that he was going to be even colder than normal on the way home, but he didn't even think about that. As long as the puppy was fine, he would be fine too.

When he was finished, Boomstick held the puppy up, just to make sure he'd done a decent enough job. In a way, he had. His cuts were covered up, with only some blood seeping through. But thankfully the red fabric would allow it not to show up too much.

"You're gonna need a bath when I get you back home too." Boomstick had no plans to leave the puppy behind in the grotty old house any longer. Especially not after what he'd been through here. Sure, Boomstick's own shack didn't look much better, but he felt he'd be safer with him.

He gently tickled the puppy's belly. “I’ll call you Jack. Simple and sweet. You happy with that?”

Jack let out a happy pant and wagged his tail. The first time he had ever done so. Boomstick smiled back and planted a small kiss on its nose.

Finally, he was able to heave himself off the ground with Jack still in his arms before heading out the door. He shut it tight behind him. Hopefully, the police weren't going to bother heading there. And if they did, surely they wouldn't come looking for him, right?

As they finally made their way back to the high street, it was like how things were before. The Christmas lights were shining and the tune of "The Christmas Waltz" filled the air from a nearby unattended radio. Nobody else was here though. They'd all finished their shopping and gone home to celebrate.

And in Boomstick's mind, that was how things should be.

A warm happy feeling settled inside him as he and Jack absorbed their surroundings. It made him chuckle slightly. He looked down at the puppy and gave him one more kiss.

Christmas won't be so lonely after all, he thought. And I'm sure the new year will be just the same.

The Lazer Robot

BUY THE HOTTEST NEW TOY THIS HOLIDAY SEASON - THE LAZER ROBOT!

COMES IN TWELVE VIVID COLORS AND WITH SPECIAL LAZER VISION!

ONLY $30.30!

A ten year old Boomstick looked at the sign in the shop window, then looked at the marketed toy itself. The one on display was a shiny red Transformer-like thing with gold and black accents on it, and occasionally its eyes would flash and shoot out what resembled lazer beams. They weren't real ones, mind you. Just special lights made to resemble them. But it still looked pretty cool.

For a moment, Boomstick just stared on at the Lazer Robot in complete awe. And then he looked at the price. $30.30. He checked in his pockets but all he could find was two cents. He could ask his mother for more, but she wouldn't be able to give him the right amount.

A flustered woman in a leopard skin coat, black crochet hat and scarlet high heels walked into the store. Boomstick headed in after her, planning to get a better look at this coveted holiday season toy. But when he looked over at the counter, she was already ordering it. She proceeded to shove the box that it was fitted inside into a plastic bag before scurrying out, tutting to herself about her "son".

Boomstick walked up to the counter and placed the two cents on the counter anyway. He half expected the the shop assistant to look down his nose and snap at him to pay more money, but he just chuckled instead. In a way, it felt worst.

"You won't be able to buy anything with that, you know," the shop assistant said, giving the boy a sad smile.

Boomstick's hand curled into a fist as if he planned to make a threat, but the shop assistant paid no mind to this. "Why don't you come back tomorrow, my young man? You'll probably have more money to buy something then."

Boomstick walked out, blushing with embarrassment and anger. Even if the shop assistant was trying to be "nice", he still came off as condescending. He'd wished that he'd brought his gun with him - maybe that would have made the message more obvious.

***

He would try again tomorrow. And the day after that. But each time, no luck. And every day, a new grown-up would buy a Lazer Robot for their kids instead, whether it be a confused granny or a lethargic middle-aged father or an anxious young mother.

For the next few days onwards, Boomstick grew increasingly desperate. Seeing the grown-ups buying it for their own kids made his stomach churn with disappointment. He tried earning pocket money from doing chores at home, but his mother could barely afford to give him more than one cent each time. He even thought he'd struck it lucky one time when he found a $50 note on the ground...except that it was a £50 instead. Even when he tried to use it in the shop, they wouldn't accept it.

At one point, he even considered going in and just stealing one when nobody was looking. But there was always that burly security guard standing next to it. Almost as if he knew that desperate kids and grown-ups were planning to nick it off the shelves rather than obtain it the correct way. Boomstick thought about fighting him, but something made him feel that, with his opponent's height, he would lose instantly. And this was a kid who was already training in basic martial arts and weapons. Speaking of weapons, he did think about attack the store with a bazooka one time, but then realised that it would risk wrecking the Lazer Robot itself in the process.

***

And then one day, Boomstick reached his breaking point. School had been dreadful as always, and given that it was the last day, he just wanted to get home for the holidays as soon as possible. Without warning, some kid barged into him without paying attention and headed off without owing so much of an apology.

As Boomstick rubbed his shoulder, which was smarting a bit from the impact, he noticed that it was Marty, the obnoxious blonde tyke who seemed to own everything and enjoyed tormenting Boomstick at every chance he got. If only they allowed guns in school, he had often thought to himself.

But worst of all, Boomstick noticed what Marty was carrying. It was the Lazer Robot he'd been searching for the whole time, in the same colour as the one in the shop. And it wasn't even Christmas Day yet.

Boomstick ran up to him. "Hey! No fair! How come you got one of those before Christmas?!"

Marty just glanced at him as if he was some annoying fly buzzing around his head.

"At least you should let me borrow it!" Boomstick stopped for a bit and then shyly begged. "Just once? Please?"

"Well maybe you should have bought one yourself!" Marty turned away haughtily. "Oh wait, you can't afford one, can you?"

That was it. Boomstick could feel his blood boiling over and his fists clenching. It was bad enough that Marty had a Lazer Robot, but now he had to bring money into the situation...

At that point, Boomstick leapt at Marty, screaming with rage and swinging his fists at him. Marty was no slouch though, and he proceeded to punch back.

They fought for a solid few minutes, the toy discarded next to them. Both kids were unwilling to relent. They both wanted that Lazer Robot, and they wanted it NOW.

At last, Boomstick sat triumphantly above a near-unconscious Marty, who now had a black eye and a bleeding nose. His pride soon turned to excitement as he noticed the toy nearby. He made a grab for it and held it in the air.

This was it. The Lazer Robot was his now. Finally he could have one like everyone else.

Pity that Marty's mum had to turn up and ruin things.

***

Mama Boomstick had just turned up to collect her son when she noticed an enraged blonde lady in a thick yellow coat marching towards her, dragging him by the arm. A bloodied Marty was walking next to them, carrying the, admittedly slightly less pristine, robot.

"Booby! What happened?!"

Marty's mother spoke first before he had time to answer.

"You there! Your son here has been menacing my own, for crying out loud!"

Marty proceeded to stick his tongue out at Boomstick, who gave him a filthy look in return.

Mama Boomstick swatted the woman's hand away from her son. As he ran over to a nearby tree to sit down behind him, he could make out a ferocious argument between both mothers. He couldn't hear all of it, but he wasn't in the mood to focus anyway.

Eventually, it died down. Boomstick thought about what had just happened and the toy robot he'd only had for a solid five seconds before having it snatched away again. He held his knees tight and buried his face in them, a tight feeling in his chest.

The sound of Mama Boomstick's voice caused him to lift it up again.

"It's okay, son. Let's go home now. Never mind that dreadful lot."

She took Boomstick's arm and helped him up. He looked back at where Marty and his mother and been. They were long gone by now.

"Mommy?"

"What is it?"

"Would you be able to buy a Lazer Robot for me?"

Mama Boomstick looked to the side and gave a despondent sigh. "I don't know if I'll be able to do it. It's pretty pricey after all."

Boomstick felt more hopeless than ever.

"But I will try," his mother said. "If you want one, so be it."

***

True to her word, she did. Not that she was any more successful than her son had been. Money was tight after all. Even bringing out the big guns didn't work this time round.

She had however been extra busy. Each night, when Boomstick went to bed, she stayed up to do some extra business. Sure, it meant that she didn't get much sleep during the night, but she still persisted.

On Christmas Eve, she watched her son get into bed again and fall asleep. Mama Boomstick looked down at him for a bit, before turning her attention to some sort of device in her hand. Determined, she placed it back in her apron pocket and headed off to the other side of their one-room shack.

***

Christmas morning. Boomstick was woken up by a hand on his shoulder.

"Happy Christmas, junebug."

Mama Boomstick was standing next to his bed holding a beer can in her other hand. She had specks of paint and grease on her dressing gown and had grey rings round her eyes. Though equally bleary-eyed, Boomstick tossed his blankets off and sat up. In front of him was a large parcel wrapped in newspaper.

"I've got your present for you here."

Boomstick reached over for the present and started unwrapping it. Even if he was tired, present-unwrapping certainly perked him up. Finally, he got the last of the newspaper off. His eyes widened.

"I thought you might like it," Mama Boomstick said.

At first, Boomstick couldn't believe it. He was currently holding his own Lazer Robot.

And then his heart sank.

It was supposed to resemble the Lazer Robot alright. But it looked more like scrap iron stuck together and then crudely painted. The head was too large, the legs were too small, and already Boomstick noticed that some of the paint was peeling off. When he tried to move the limbs, they were stiff and almost stuck in place.

"It's not the best version of it out there," Mama Boomstick said. "But I saw it in the shop window myself and took note of what it looked like. And then spent the next few days working on it. I even tried to copy the lazer vision it supposedly came with. Took me all night to sort that out."

Boomstick didn't really know what to think. Sure, it was nice that his mother had gone to all that effort to make a version of the Lazer Robot for him. But at the same time, it wasn't THE Lazer Robot. It wasn't shiny or sleek like the real deal. It was just scrap material combined together to form a cheap copy.

But then again, there was something kind of special about the fact that his mother HAD gone to all that effort. After all, she'd said that she couldn't afford the real thing either. Plus, it was better than not having ANY sort of toy at all.

And now that Boomstick looked at it even more closely, it did look like a decent-enough robot after all. Not a perfect one, but a good one. Even if it wasn't THE Lazer Robot.

Tears started to well up in his eyes. Mama Boomstick took note of this.

"Are you alright?" she asked with great concern. "I mean, I tried to-"

Boomstick gave her a tearful smile before throwing himself onto her and giving her a tight hug. "It's great. T-thank you Mommy..."

A small smile settled on Mama Boomstick's face as she hugged him back. For a moment, they didn't say a word.

Finally, Boomstick got off her and wiped his face with a fist.

"Well, I'm glad you like it," said Mama Boomstick. "I was worried for a sec, but if you're fine with it..."

"Yeah," Boomstick nodded. "Happy Christmas to you too."

As he held out the Lazer Robot, there was a flash. Almost as if some device in it had been activated. Lasers shot out of its eyes at a shockingly fast speed. They proceeded to singe part of the wall behind the family dog, who started yapping ferociously and ran off in fright.

Boomstick was speechless at first, but then a grin spread across his face. "You gave it ACTUAL lazer eyes?"

"Sure did, sweetheart." Mama Boomstick chuckled as she took another sip of beer.

Boomstick felt his body tingle with happiness. "Oh Marty and the others are so missing out," he giggled.

Mama Boomstick smiled back and headed over to the kitchen area, which was in the opposite corner of the shack. "Now does my son want Southern-Fried Squirrel for his Christmas morning breakfast?"

Boomstick bounded out of bed, still holding onto his Lazer Robot. "Hell yeah!"

And so mother and son sat down together at the table, happily tucking into their breakfast and chattering on about how they were going to spend the rest of Christmas day. A merry Christmas after all, they thought to themselves. The whole time, the Lazer Robot stood (fairly) proudly on the table between them.

Dynamite's Diary - 17th December 2021

The school play was on tonight...but that's not I'm focusing on here. What I'm going to focus on instead is that I may risk being kicked out of school again for the first time since that incident in elementary school.

So the play was about to start and everyone was getting all excited about it backstage. Steve was pumped up about it and kept looking through his script just to make sure that he wasn't forgetting anything. The lead actors were getting all lovey-dovey, so I assume that the play must have really brought them together. Marlene wasn't so thrilled though - she was just nervously kicking her legs back and forth as always. I mean, she wasn't even one of the actors! All she had to do was just blend in, but apparently even sitting near a stage is just too much for her.

So far, so good. All I had to do was just sit there too, just to show that I had a role in getting everything together as well. Except that I was pretty sure that I heard a rustling. And then I was pretty sure that I noticed someone sneaking out of the back door. Meanwhile, everybody else was just too excited to notice what was going on.

My first thought was "Kinsey's sabotaging things!" So I decided to sneak out and follow this mystery person.

Gemma saw what I was doing almost straight away.

"What are you doing? The show's just starting!"

I almost stuttered in my response, worried that other people had noticed. "Gemma, I think there's a saboteur behind the scenes and I need to make sure they don't mess things up tonight. Look, just promise not to tell anyone, 'kay?"

She was pretty relaxed about it, as she usually is about most things. "Sure, if you say so."

So I was free to go. Hopefully nobody else picked up on my mystery disappearance. And hopefully I'd be able to make it back in time.

Once I was in the hallway, I took a glance round and then made a mad dash. As I neared the end, I noticed a leg belonging to someone exiting the building through one of the emergency exits. I knew I had a play to go back to, but I had to follow this person at the same time.

At this point, I was glad that I'd been wearing my jacket all this time. And wearing my rucksack. I'd rushed in a bit late to the hall earlier on so I hadn't had time to remove them. But what if my pursuit lasted longer?

It was once I was outside the building that I realized who I'd been following the whole time. No, it wasn't Kinsey, thank god. But the other person I'd been concerned about that evening.

"DAD?!"

Seriously, he'd taken one of the props from backstage and just gone off with it. Luckily it was the crumped tree prop that we weren't using anymore, but still.

"Dad, what the hell are you doing?! You can't just come into the building like that and then leave with the props!"

He didn't even bother answering my question. He just seemed chuffed about getting the tree.

"Could tell this was yours from how you painted it. Don't know why you'd think about tossin' it aside."

We continued walking out of the school gates just bickering with one another, me getting pissed off at the fact that he had the gall to do something like that and him getting all huffy about me getting pissed off at him. We even ended up crossing the street because things were getting so heated.

"Look," he was all like, now making these wild gestures with his hands that he does when he's super agitated. "Can't a dad just appreciate his daughter's hard work?! That's all I'm saying-"

As he was continuing to moan about it all, his hand struck the face of someone walking pass with a ridiculously large purse.

"Mind out, you idiot!"

It was Kinsey. As if my night wasn't going off the rails enough. And now both her and my dad were getting into a scuffle. He just turned round, looked shocked, and then gave her sheepish grin.

"Oh, um hey! Sorry 'bout that."

Kinsey just railed at him. "God, can't you keep your stupid fat hands to yourself?!" She almost spat as she walked off. "Disgusting tramp."

Boy, Dad was livid over that. He just started freaking out and yelling angry comments back at her. I had to try and restrain him in case he actually started physically attacking her, but he just broke out of my grip.

And then, without warning, he just collapsed on his knees, covered his face with his hands and started crying. All he could muster out was a feeble "W-what the hell?" under his breath.

I was completely at a loss at what to do. Normally if Dad gets insulted like that, he just carries on flipping out. And on the occasions when he does cry, it's usually faked so he can guilt trip someone. But since I've known him for some time, I can tell when it's genuine and when it's fake. And this time, it was truly genuine. And truly upsetting.

And then, at that point, I could feel a disgusting sense of rage boiling over. Looking back, I probably shouldn't have let it get the better of me, but I didn't see anything else I could do at the time.

First of all, I took my jacket off and gave it to Dad. Plopped it on his shoulders. I felt he needed something to keep him warm - it was a cold night after all.

"Dad, you stay here. I'll sort her out in no time."

He looked so confused about it all - I guess he was still emotionally overwhelmed. Meanwhile, I just walked over with my rucksack to where Kinsey was about to head into the school gates...

...And proceeded to jump kick her in the back.

"Disgusting tramp, eh?! And you're an arrogant bitch!"

Kinsey staggered, but then turned round and noticed me. Despite us attending the same school, this was pretty much the first time we properly interacted with one another.

"What the-? Since when-"

"You DO NOT talk like that about my dad when I'm around!"

"Sure I can! I mean, have you seen him for yourself? He's definitely not one who should be getting boned with an appearance like that, I'm telling you!"

"Oh THAT fuckin' smarts!"

Yep. It wasn't the past things that Kinsey had done that had ticked me off at long last. Even the possibility that she would have sabotaged the play didn't phase me. But getting my Dad involved in all this...

"So if you're gonna be that way around him..." I opened my rucksack and got out the several sticks of dynamite and lighter I keep in there just in case situations like these arise. "You just fucked up big time!"

Kinsey looked super stunned at first, but then made a face like some sour lemon before reaching into her own purse.

"'Kay then. If you're gonna be like that, fine."

And at that point she pulled out a freaking rifle. Seriously!!! I've heard of her spreading nasty rumors about others and framing others for cyberbullying and ruining others' dresses with buckets filled with tomato juice...but shooting others?! Was THAT how she planned to sabotage the night? To be fair, I did hear rumors about last year's prom queen at school "mysteriously" losing her eye the next day. That was probably why.

"Shouldn't have even been the talk of the school back in October!"

Yeah, she was still pissed off about that too. And now she was snapping out in the same way that I was.

Not that I was backing down or anything. I just threw my first dynamite stick at her. I'm surprised that she was able to jump out of the way in time before it exploded.

Kinsey then fired the rifle. I managed to get out of the way in time as well, though one of the bullets did graze across my cheek. I then lit my second dynamite stick and threw it, but ultimately threw it too hard and hit a street lamp in the process.

Bizarrely enough, Dad actually sounded happy and was cheering me on. "Yeah, you show her! Way to go!"

I don't know how long Kinsey and I spent fighting. I'm sure that if Dad had gone ahead with attacking her in the first place, he would have finished her off in seconds. I'd pretty much gone through all of the dynamite sticks I had except one. That said, Kinsey did seem to be having problems with her last few shots. Still didn't stop her from landing a kick to my face with her high heels and knocking me to the ground in the process.

With that, I probably would have been done for. My last stick of dynamite had been knocked out of my grasp and I couldn't reach it since Kinsey had stomped a high-heeled foot on my chest. It felt like it was stabbing right through my ribcage. Plus, she'd got her rifle right towards the center of my eyes.

I could actually hear Dad angrily whimpering nearby. "If you dare-"

Good news though! When Kinsey pulled the trigger, nothing came out. Guess she must have used up all her bullets.

"Shit! Why isn't this-"

At which point I yanked the gun and slammed it with all my might back into her own face. Sent her staggering onto the ground. Great! Now I just needed to fetch that stick of dynamite and then it would be done.

I grabbed it and lit it, and then threw it where Kinsey was. She was trying to get up from the ground before noticing it flying towards her.

That last explosion nearly blinded me. Well, I had made the mistake of standing too close. Pretty much got sent flying backwards.

When I opened my eyes, I noticed Dad looking at me with this wide-eyed expression. If he was planning to say anything, it wasn't coming out. Despite the pains in my body, and especially my face and chest, I got up and looked over at where the explosion had come from.

I don't really know how I should feel about it even now. On the one hand, Kinsey was an absolute bitch who needed to be knocked down a peg or two. ESPECIALLY after making Dad cry. But I didn't expect things to have to end this way.

We just stared at the crater and where Kinsey should have been. There wasn't really anything we could say about it. She just wasn't there anymore. It was just a ring of ash. We then turned to each other.

Dad got up from where he'd been...and then slapped me upside the head.

"You idiot..." He was still choked up, but he actually sounded a bit happier. He clearly was, since straight afterwards, he pulled me in for another one of his bone-crushing hugs.

"That was a super awesome show you put on there and MUCH better than whatever your school play whatever was!" Dad was laughing and crying at the same time. "Oh thank you so much!"

"Dad - it was nothing - really - it wasn't," I tried to say, even though my windpipe felt absolutely crushed from Dad squashing me that tightly.

"Oh, but they'll be coming back for you in a minute," he then started. "We've got to get away! We've got to run away -- quick!" Well, I guess he'd been watching The Wizard of Oz earlier that afternoon. He's not quite kicked the habit of referencing movies he's recently watched.

To which he then took my hand and started running backs towards the direction where his shack was, dragging me across the ground in the process. I couldn't really do much except complain "But the play Dad! I've got to get back to the play!" Not that he heard me. He was WAY too euphoric to notice.

So yeah, I didn't get to see Steve perform or take part in the curtain call after all. To be fair though, I did say that I wasn't that interested in the play itself. But still, it would have been nice to watch Steve acting onstage and possibly steal the show from the leads in the process.

Gemma texted me later about it all. She says that the play was a moderate success overall, though there was a moment of panic when a weird explosion sound was heard from some distance away. One of the teachers even thought that there had been a gas explosion and was still in hysterics afterwards.

So yeah, I have no idea what happened to Kinsey. Who knows? Maybe she survived after all and she'll be back next week? All I can do is hope that the school doesn't find out and I don't get kicked out or arrested or anything.

As I said, I'm still not sure how to feel. Should I feel smug that I finally got that stupid brat out of the picture and that she didn't mess up the play after all? Or should I feel ashamed of possibly getting someone at my school killed and getting myself potentially expelled as a result. Just like when Mel Crombey made the same mistake at elementary school by saying that my dad

Well, the holidays are coming soon. I guess I'll just try to enjoy them and worry about all of this afterward. Everyone says that Christmas is a time to relax and have fun and not get stressed out by anything else. I don't know it that philosophy will work for this situation, but I hope it does.

Dynamite's Diary - 9th December 2021

It's a week before the school play gets properly shown, and everyone's even crazier about it than ever. I haven't even had a chance to have a quick chat with Steve - he's so obsessed with getting his lines right that rehearsing in and out of school is all that he seems to be doing nowadays. Dad was real peeved about this and seems to think that this is a sign that he's a super shallow boyfriend, but he's just overreacting himself.

Marlene's had to help stitch a few of the costumes up, since they were falling apart a bit. I initially assumed that Kinsey was sabotaging things behind the scenes when Marlene mentioned that, but she reassured me that they were fine.

The scenery's been alright on the most part too. There was an onstage accident at one point where one of the actors tripped and fell into one of the trees I'd helped paint and got it all bashed up as a result, but that was fortunately last week and Gemma and I were able to get a new one sorted out.

That said, we're still on the lookout in case anything serious happens. We haven't told the teachers about our patrol, but that's just because we don't really have any proof that Kinsey's going to actively interfere. Gemma, Smartie and I are making sure that nobody damages or puts graffiti on the background stuff and props, Marlene's keeping a close eye on the costumes and Lottie's being all vigilante about the music in case something happens to the music.

I wouldn't necessarily be bothered about all of this otherwise, but my friends and I did have a part in making sure it was going well, so we might as well keep it up. Don't want all those efforts going to waste.

I don't know how I'm expected to do anything that night. Apparently we're expected to be there when the show happens, but I don't want to just sit there in the rafters and do nothing whilst other people act and sing. To be honest, I'm still not super invested in the story myself.

Well, it would be nice to see Steve act onstage. That would definitely be worth staying for. I really hope he doesn't screw up his part - he's been practicing so hard and it would be a shame for it all to go to waste.

I guess I'll stay for the night then. I'll certainly enjoy seeing Steve perform. That way I won't get bored. Then I'll join him, Gemma, Lottie, Smartie and Marlene in bowing for the audience at the end and gaining our applause for doing our part for the play, even if Steve was the only one acting.

Now let's just hope that Kinsey doesn't do anything to mess things up...

Dynamite's Diary - 4th December 2021

What did I tell you? It's still all about the Christmas play at school. Everyone's rehearsing like mad and chattering non-stop about it. Even Steve seems to focus more on it nowadays - he hasn't had time to practice basketball or hang out with me during recess.

Just when I thought that Lottie and Kinsey were whining about not getting parts in the production, Dad's been getting all huffy too. He still doesn't get why I haven't got a part as one of the actors. I had to remind him yet again today about why that couldn't be the case.

"Look, I told you Dad, none of the parts interested me."

"Well, they should have figured out a role that would have suited you then! Geez, what is up with these scriptwriters anyway? Can't they just make a few changes and then-"

"Too late. The rehearsals are already happening."

"Hmph, sounds like it'll be a terrible play anyway." He "No wait - I don't mean the whole play! I'm sure that the scenery looks good and stuff - I just don't care about the rest of it."

I got the feeling that he'd made up his mind at this point. "So, I guess that means you're not going to watch it then."

Dad actually paused for a bit. "Well, I can just check out the stage. You can show me what you've worked on."

"I - I don't think they would allow that. The school probably wouldn't approve of us coming in just for that, and not watching the play at the same time."

"Whatever! I'll just go in when they're not there! Problem solved!"

"Look, I can take photos of the stage if you want me to. Then I can show them to you on my phone. Does that sound like a good idea?"

"Not the same." Dear lord, he really wasn't giving in. "I want a closer look at it for myself."

I really don't see how this problem is going to be resolved by opening night. Dad's always been pretty stubborn, and it takes so much effort to make him back down.

In other news, he's not in a completely grumpy mood. He's pretty happy about his new eye powers. Apparently Grandma helped him out with them. He won't stop using them though, and it's causing complete chaos. Just ask those poor people at the supermarket the other day.

Well, as long as he doesn't break into the school hall and use his eye powers whilst the play's happening, it'll probably be fine. The best case scenario would be if he has work that day. I can only hope...